IN THE MARRY MONTH OF JUNE - The funny side of weddings and marriages
After a little boy attend his first wedding, his cousin asked him, "How many women can a man marry?"
"Sixteen," the boy replied.
"How do you know that?" his cousin asked.
"Easy," the boy replied. "All you have to do is add it up, like the pastor said, four better, four worse, four richer, and four poorer."
‒ via newsletter of Evart (MI) United Methodist Church
All eyes were on the radiant bride as her father escorted her down the aisle. When they reached the altar and the waiting groom, the bride kissed her father and placed something in his hand.
The guests in the front pews responded with ripples of laughter. Even the pastor smiled broadly. As her father gave her away in marriage, the bride gave him back his credit card.
At his wedding rehearsal dinner on the night before the wedding, the priest took the groom aside and emphatically told him, "Remember, marriage is as permanent as death!"
"That was scary for a young man," the man recalled. "I could hardly sleep the night before the wedding."
He and his wife recently celebrated their 60th anniversary.
‒ Columnist Smiley Anders
Baton Rouge (LA) Advocate
Newspaper typos:
"Mr. and Mrs. Walter F. Hill announce the coming marriage of their daughter Helene. No mate has been selected for the wedding."
‒ Richard Lederer
in his book, The Revenge of Anguished English
"They were married and lived happily even after."
‒ Richard Lederer
Sign seen in Kalamazoo, MI:
"For those weddings postponed due to COVID-19, God is giving you a second chance to think about it."
‒ via Prof. John Geisler
Kalamazoo, MI
The president of the Gondola Association in Venice, Italy, announced that the maximum capacity for the romantic boats is being reduced from six persons to five because "over the last 10 years tourists weigh more." The heavier loads often mean the boats, a favorite of honeymooners, take on water, which makes it harder for the gondoliers to navigate in heavy traffic.
"Going forward with over half a ton of meat on board is dangerous," he said.
‒ via Rev. Dr. Karl R. Kraft
Dover, DE
A husband and wife went to a Catholic priest for marital counseling.
"Father, the husband began, "we came to see you because you were married before your wife died and you became a priest – and you understand women."
©2024 the Joyful Noiseletter. All Rights Reserved
Articles
Christian Performer Matthew West Lets Humor Bring Gospel Joy in Songs of Grace
Fairly Spiritual Worship Service
God's kids say and do the funniest things
The Gospel according to Erma Bombeck
Abe Lincoln's sanity saved by his humor
ON MY SERIOUS SIDE: WHERE DID ALL THE PEACEMAKERS GO?
THE HOLY GHOSTWRITER Rejoice in the different ways people worship God
A laugh a day keeps the psychiatrist away
God's kids say & do the funniest things
Will Rogers - America's greatest journalist?
Christian Civil War? A Joyful Jesus or a Sad Jesus?
After the Winter, God sends the Spring
The Holy Ghostwriter: Unpraiseworthy Band
Pastor lifts congregation's spirits
An old Orthodox prayer to end an unorthodox war
IT'S A MIRACLE! A health and diet book with a spiritual focus
A New Year's prayer to end all epidemics
The healing power and joy of forgiveness
The Holy Ghostwriter: First Christmas News Reports
The Gospel according to Erma Bombeck
GESUNDHEIT! What we all can learn from Tom Brady, 'St. GOAT'
Is the Press Sleeping on the Job? Beyond Pesticides & the rise of interest in organic foods
IN THE MARRY MONTH OF JUNE - The funny side of weddings and marriages
'St. Mugg's' resurrection: 'Laughter is God's therapy'
An Easter Reflection: Where did the Pharaohs go?
Whatever happened to 'good works'?
185,000 members spread Joygerms worldwide
What the news media didn't tell you about pandemics
Patch Adams calls for 'a revolution of loving'
Messianic Jewish wit full of one-liners
Celebrating JN's 35th Anniversary
Why not invite brains to the coronavirus press briefings?
Groucho Marx mask befuddles coronavirus
A 'Resurrection Day' for healed parishioners?
'March of Prayer' is 'March Gladness'
Shopping Cart |
Cart is empty |
You can subscribe to the printed or electronic version of JN by:
- using our secure online store.
- filling out the Printable Order Form and mailing it, along with your check for $29, to The Joyful Noiseletter, PO Box 895, Portage, MI 49081-0895 (foreign printed subscribers add $10).
- calling TOLL-FREE, 1-800-877-2757, and using VISA, MasterCard, Discover, or American Express.